Frozen in place, the memories come back
in flashes.
Fear. Hate. Blame. Loss. Sob. Fake.
Empty. Pain. Voices. Lies.
Hit. Hate. Hell.
Thoughts. Fear. Coward.
Stop! Stop! Stop!
Please.
Razor? Pill? Knife? Jump?
Stop it!
End it!
Stop it!
End it!
Stop!
Die!
Stop!
Kill!
Crying. Begging. Searching.
Lost.
Empty. Dying. Fear. Hate. Pain. Hell.
End it?
End it!
End it.
End it!
Can't.
Coward.
Hate. Sob. Hit. Think. Fear. Hide.
Fake. Empty. Pain. Masking.
God!
Beg. Cry. Hit. Blame.
God?
Voices. Lies.
Truth?
Hit. Hate. Hell.
Pain.
Razor?
Pain.
Pill?
Pain.
Knife?
Pain.
Jump?
Why?
Blame. Hate. Loss. Sob. Dying.
Hope?
Gone.
Pain?
Real.
Who?
Nothing.
Me?
No one.
Voices. Lies?
Hate. Hate. Hate.
Coward! End it! End it! End it!
Can't?
No.
Peace?
Want.
End it!
Sob. Hit. Hate. Hell.
End it!
Pain. Poison. Please!
Deliverance? Deliverance?
Sob. Beg. Pain.
God!
End this.
Back to now and I look you in your
eyes.
I don't know pain?
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